Coming to Terms with Imperfection in My Art
Earlier today I was painting the face of a blue and saddened woman and the more that I painted her and tried to fix her, the worse the painting became.
I found myself frustrated, upset, disappointed…. My truth being weakened by the merciless ego, thoughts of “I don’t even know why I try, nothing I ever do turns out”, “Maybe I should just give up on art, I’m not even good at it” and the painful feeling of not being good enough or adequate enough to be an artist or to follow my dreams as a creative soul on this planet.
I let these thoughts and emotions taint my heart for hours, and my array of various emotions gradually turned to a fiery anger. I was angry at myself for not being better, for not being farther along as an artist, for not yet mastering my craft and for wasting so much of my invaluable time on a seemingly worthless piece of art.
And in the midst of these ludicrous meanderings, I was inspired to search for a speech or a song to uplift me. I simply couldn’t bare being alone in my mind for a moment longer!
Within moments of coming to this conclusion, I came across a motivational speech presented by Denzel Washington.
In the height of Denzel’s message he said, “Say thank you in advance for what is already yours. True Desire in the heart, for anything good is God’s proof to you sent beforehand to indicate that it’s already yours… that itch that you have, whatever it is that you want to do, that thing that you want to do to help others and to grow and to make money, that desire, that itch, that is God’s proof to you sent beforehand already to indicate that it’s already yours”….
Once again, he said “True Desire in the heart, for anything good is God’s proof to you sent beforehand to indicate that it’s already yours”, and I cried.
I cried because I felt his words and the energy of his words so deep in my being and in that moment, everything in me shifted back to wholeness and I came back to myself and my truth.
Overcoming the struggle with perfectionism as an artist is not easy, but it’s always worth the persistence and determination. I knew I was guided to that specific speech for that specific message. I know it because the longing to express myself and to embrace life as a radiant force of compassion and creativity, consumes me.
I know for certain that art plays a major role in what I came here to do. And because I was reminded of my truth, I was able to gain crystal clear clarity in that moment:
Not every piece of art needs to be “perfect” or beautiful, or even seen.
It’s both safe and okay for both you & I, to explore different avenues of expression, without attachment to the outcome. As in, we don’t need to share it, nobody needs to see it and we can allow ourselves to just let go & be present with the art we are channeling, without judgement.
Art is a deeply healing practice and when we engage in the process, trapped emotions often surface and can sometimes affect the outcome of our work as we work through them. And when we’re able to let go of the need to meet self-imposed standards, we create a safe space for us to truly transform our lives and grow as artists.
I hope this post has helped you in some way to be reminded of the real purpose of our art and why you showing up and doing the work is all that matters.
All of my Love,